“Why don’t you get out of those wet clothes and into a dry martini”

-Robert Benchley

When did men start drinking Margaritas? …or Daiquiris? or anything else that has more than two colors, an umbrella and the equivalent of half a pineapple? Sex on the beach? Seriously guys? That is the definition of a good vacation weekend, not a drink!

OK, I understand that variety is the spice of life, also in the drinks department. However; a lemon & peach daiquiri with a baby blue umbrella and a quarter kiwi is not going to support the alpha male image you’re trying to project…

Why am I ranting on about this? My regular watering hole on the weekend. I had just left great after-work drinks, at a good place in stunning company…

(Dry Martini, with Grey Goose, Dirty. I always roll the “r” on “dirrrrty”   –   When I order a rolled “r” Dirrrrty Martini; I am officially off the clock 😉 )

…and as I mostly do on a Friday eve, I head towards the city centre. There I notice that for some reason a sizeable part of the male population in my usual pub have opted for technicolor fashion juices in a long drink glass with pot-pourri decorations.

Though very tempted; I won’t judge.

Personally? If I want fruit juice; I’ll order fruit juice. Though I have been seen ordering Jack’n’Cokes or Coronas, the poison of choice is usually straight up or in a tumbler. Beer isn’t really on my list, simply because I can’t handle it, a good red wine over a good meal always works and of course the dry Martini after work… dirty if the mood is right 😉

So, yes; I drink… I enjoy a good drink and there have been times where I had one or two too many. But you know what? So did the likes of Frank Sinatra and Sean Connery and though I’d never dream of comparing myself to them; I’m in good company. And neither Ol’ Blue Eyes nor the original Commander Bond would have been caught dead with a technicolor fruit, umbrella and deco drink.

Conclusion? Fruit belongs in a dessert, olives belong in a martini   …and nowhere else.

I’ll be at the bar…